Here's how it all went down...He got fussy around 7 while we were at small group, which is pretty typical, and he settled down a bit after I fed him. He slept until about 9, when he ate again and then crashed for the night. The craziest thing was that when I woke up around 3 and realized he hadn't woken up yet, my first reaction was a sort of sadness - he doesn't need me as much already! Wouldn't you think it would be relief? After all, that's the longsest I've slept since I was about 6 months pregnant!
I quickly realized my reaction was perhaps a teeny bit unhealthy, but this morning as I've been thinking about it more, I'm starting to wonder if that's the first of many similar instances to come... The point of parenting is to raise children up so they don't need you - and that simple statement of fact seems to be laden with heartbreak for mothers. On the flip side, though, as a child grows and you see the characteristics you've instilled become part of their personality, you can feel a sense of accomplishment. Don't get me wrong - I am super excited about a full-night's sleep, but it is the first step toward realizing he isn't going to be a baby forever, so in that way, it was bittersweet. At the same time, I am looking forward to every phase of Beckett's life and am excited to see how our family grows and changes over time. Meanwhile, I'll be enjoying some additional hours of shut-eye.
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